It's MY Life Thanks : )

So it's pretty well taken a good 27 years or so just to be able to say that comfortably...What a relief!

Living life to please others will ultimately never make one's own self happy- for people who weren't born or socialised to be assertive like me-that's the most important thing you gotta take home from this post!!!

This post got inspired when in all my excitement as usual the first thing I blabbed to my folks who just got back from overseas was my whole Go to China Further Training revelation and my recent encounter with the old wise herbal expert practitioner...

My mum's immediate reaction: "Don't be so ambitious!"

I really don't get it, maybe she herself has a complex of being scared of failure so never wants to let me even Try!! Reminder: People can survive failure and disappointment-if anything they're good lessons for how to improve!

Yes parents, you gotta learn to let go- let your kids learn things for themselves the hard way- they can't always be under your protective bubble!

So anyway, last night I did a bit more research on the scholarship by talking to one of the winners from this year. Unfortunately, because I am not white blood and cos my school doesn't offer any scholarships I won't be eligible.

I also looked into the option of travelling as part of school for clinical hours but the reality is, not knowing any Mandarin- how much will I really learn? compared to staying local...so thinking through other options- I'm getting increasingly frustrated at not being able to get sufficient training in herbs because not only is my school skewed towards manual therapies and acupuncture...even if I want to organise private training there are such a lack of good herbalists that can function in English! Perhaps...due to these limitations (and my age!) I will have to go lateral and learn western herbs rather than try and specialise in Chinese herbs for internal medicine. hmmm...

Jumping back to thought from before...it's weird how most people I know succumb to peer pressure-for me that's never been an issue- but parental pressure-wow total other story!

Anyway I'm glad I've learnt to assert myself FINALLY and hopefully with all this expert herbal treatment, in 2 years I will be a lot healthier to be a lot more self sufficient and possibly even financially independent so have less obligation to succumb to other people's interests...

I'm sure my mum will be a lot happier and more at ease if I just get a husband, have kids and be a housewife which is possibly fine (bar the last part long term) but hmmm that depends on finding THE RIGHT PERSON and that's never guaranteed...so I'm happy with my direction now :)

In any case I'm only not yet 28- so I wish people would stop worrying- I think if you're a very independent person who likes time to yourself, has friends and is busy doing what you enjoy then lonesome factor should not kick in in a big way until perhaps you're retired, stuck in a house and have few friends...then maybe, you might consider settling for companionship...LOL