Thursday, November 13, 2008

The Middle Path

So I managed to get to a screening of documentaries by amateur film makers...was pretty cool being back in that scene- really felt "familiar" and took me back...after all my first love after visual arts started with videography not photography but I think I kind of lapsed into photography cos that suits my lazy nature - I just don't have the patience for countless hours in post production!

Anyway it was inspiring, maybe if I could find like-minded co-conspirators I wouldn't mind getting back into film making...the only thing is both TCM and film making require a huge commitment so having so many interests to dabble in I can only take on one that requires a big commitment so TCM will have to win out for now!

Anyhow by the end of it I was starving so I went in search of food...craving dumplings I rocked up at the shop only for the man to shoo me away and say it was closing time...far out! Anyway it was that point I wished I lived in a bustling 24-7 metropolis like New York or at least somewhere which has more of a night culture like Spain or Asia...cos things not being open and not being able to find decent food at 10pm is THE PITS! So in the end I had to settle for...fast food in a doggy bag-Berk!:P

Anyhow this thought train progressed into the following self analysis and reflection on the fact that I am such a paradoxical creature...and find it so hard to negotiate the polar forces within...as follows...maybe I'm just hard to please!

*I love the worldly, switched on, accessible and cultured nature of a bustling metropolis BUT I also love the wide open spaces, care and friendly intimacy of a small regional town.

*I need ALOT of personal space and take real comfort in alone time however at the same time I really need the constant mental stimulation that you can only get from interaction with a whole variety of people.

*I really feel the need to engage with creative dreamers but at the same time it can sometimes get a little airy fairy and I appreciate a bit of hard headed rationalism, groundedness and appreciation for everyday sensibilities in the people around me.

*East-West: the asians say I'm a pathetic excuse for an asian, the westerns think I'm asian but then get disappointed when they realise I'm not exotic, agreeable and subservient after all.

*Factual Realism vs Dreamy Possibility - can they really co-exist?!

*Logical and apathetic Detachment vs Passionate and Enthusiastic Engagement

Eh...I can hear the voice of friends...You think waaaay too much! LOL

5 comments:

Dina said...

I am VERY disappointed that you're not agreeable and subservient. I was planning to make you my slave when we come to Sydney.

I guess that will be a bit of a challenge now.

I was into videography too. I haven't done it in awhile though. I'm trying to decide whether to bring my video camera to Australia or not.

I'm with you on the creative people thing. I like being around dreamers, but some of them are a bit too out there for me. I had some Livejournal friends who believed they were elves reborn as humans. I think that's very possible, but it bothered me that they were so sure about it. I'm open-minded to the supernatural/occult/spiritual stuff. But I always like to look at things from a variety of angles.

Shannanigans said...

Cool then you should move to Thunder Bay

It has people, food, shops...but is 8 hours away from anything else

You can be alone as much as you want, but be warned, there have been a few elderly people found eaten by their cats. I wish I was kidding

If you have the urge to be around people, go to any of the skanky bars around here and that will cure you of that urge immediately!

Healingstones said...

We all have contrary natures - if anyone tells you they don't they are lying (a bit contrary, eh?!)

Yin and yang!

mscherrylane said...

Dina, sorry to disappoint but surely you're charming enough that SOMEONE will willingly be your slave? LOL maybe that will end up being me cos I'm a sucker for interesting people...(!)

LOL what were those livejournal friends ON?! yeah I'm open minded but only to an extent...mind you with that Nepalese man who they say is Buddha or a God reincarnated...who has existed on nothing but meditation for so long, anything's possible!!!

I'm the same, although I'm open minded I still always ask why and need to reason/test things first...

mscherrylane said...

Shannon,

old people eaten by their cats- that is indeed sad.

and p.s Sydney city has no shortage of skanky bars and(bite my lip)a whole lot more...in short, NOOOOOOOOO THANKS!

no wonder they're fleeing this city in droves...so vacuous and tacky especially the cbd as time goes on...it was nice when I was growing up though!