Monday, September 21, 2009

Cultural Fencesitting

I've been having this horrible niggling feeling lately...one of cultural fencesitting discomfort...which is idiotic because it is obviously something I will never be able to resolve having grown up in an environment and culture disparate to my ethnicity.

Maybe I will feel better if I get to know more Eurasians, even though I'm not one...cos really, I feel 50-50. Or at least when I am with asians, I feel Caucasian relative...and when I am with Caucasians I feel asian...It's almost like I choose to be difficult on purpose...I will always tend to the opposite/minority way.

In any case I went to a full asian house for dinner tonight- big meal lots of dishes chopsticks bowls soup all gathered around a circular table...the predominant language was something asian...wow I felt it was all so exotic and I felt disconnected but at the same time that there was something comfortably familiar...

arghhhhh.

5 comments:

HappyOrganist said...

you don't like it feeling comfortable? how funny =)

Delighted Scribbler said...

Definitely describes my reality as well. Although for me it's sort of backwards. I tend to identify with the majority culture surrounding me. And my most comfortable social space is nestled amongst international people. I guess when we're all different, we embrace the essence of all that makes us so alike.

Zz... said...

Oh, wow thanks for your comment DS...you helped me realise I DO always identify with a minority...so rationally having been in a western culture almost from birth I probably shouldn't identify with my ethnicity and people of my ethnicity as much as I do...I probably only do it cos I am skewed towards siding with underdogs and minorities...

Zz... said...

oh, p.s your comment thing doesn't work...i wanted to say thanks for the bright star recommendation, I'd been looking for a me kind of movie to see...

Unknown said...

It is a bit weird being a third culture kid isn't it?