I wonder...

if all third culture kids experience a serious sense of cross cultural displacement unless they either enter a completely alien culture or always mix with foreigners or expats?

or maybe it is only the problem of fence sitters...I guess if you definitively took a side and adapted to identify with just one of your cultures prioritising either look or geography, then maybe it is easier.

I think I feel complete cross cultural displacement in my new digs...so escape from all cultures I may represent into a completely alien one seems a very tempting option. I think maybe the two countries I would feel the least sense of displacement (or where it didn't bother me) might be either Japan or Switzerland.

but yes until then perhaps I am most comfortable being a wandering gypsy...

Stranger things have happened...LOL

I was sitting on my couch having a lazy leisurely afternoon working through the most recent season of MAD MEN when I heard these terrible bloodcurdling screams of torment..."what on earth?" I thought...

so I peeked through the shutters outside and saw three ducks physically fighting!! Two were jumping on and (what looked to me) pecking another half to death on it's neck! "oh no!" was my immediate thought and I went off to find a broom to help rescue the victim...

But when I came back...I saw one chase the other one out under the fence...DUH so naive...lol welcome to Duck Mating Season...IN MY GARDEN!

So anyway, as a total sucker for ducks I decided to treat the newlyweds...and gave them a water bath and some corn crackers...I think they think my place is some kind of five star resort now...Anyway it was pretty fun to play with them...

After their little "play" both of them were shaking and sitting...I'm not sure whether I should expect to find little duck eggs somewhere in my garden or not.

Anyway, it was a totally unexpected afternoon and quite interesting- I felt a little like David Attenborough, lol.

A Higher Standard...Of Maleness!

They say that the things you experience as a child really affect you...I only recently remembered that probably my earliest memory of encountering a guy that wasn't family as a kid was actually...a European! My sister's penpal that just suddenly "dropped over" with flowers and chocolates from so many thousands of kilometres unannounced...lol, romantic? You don't say!

Perhaps it is based on THAT (he was Swiss) that all my expectations of how men are supposed to be got formed....ie: that they are polite, eloquent, refined, cultured, civilised, intelligent, thoughtful...and did I say POLITE?!!

Lol a far cry from the rude uncivilised can't spell or form sentences sleazy rude yobbo thugs that treat women like "girl-meat" here and holler at them like dogs...Today on the bus I almost imploded by how bad the music was...and seriously I have been all throughout the country and never had to endure such terrible tasteless music...in any case a great reprieve from my yobbo conditions lately...some arty films, a euro exhibition, an internationally renowned line up for a music festival...and a third culture kid of my same disposition, likes and interests to buddy up with-exciting!!!

So anyway, perhaps cos of being exposed to a Swiss in my formulative impressionable childhood years I have NEVER managed to accept anything less... maybe I AM a snob like I get accused of...so be it! I have STANDARDS!!! :)

INTERNATIONALS.....Arghhhhhh!!!! :-D

THANK. YOU. GOD!!!!

May you and I all never forget that God is faithful and answers prayers :) ^^ ^^ ^^!!

So anyway I was *so so excited* I finally cracked through my monoculture no culture brains void bang head on brick wall issue here....

I seriously had had it up to HERE(motions 50cm above head) with the uncultured yob factor and Tall Poppy Sooks I get subjected to here...not to mention all the vacant stares...seriously, okay for sure it's elitist and Aussies have major overaffliction of Tall Poppy Syndrome and thus related oversensitivity but SERIOUSLY, sometimes it IS just about being able to converse with people at the SAME LEVEL of your understanding on various things...I don't know why such offense and discrimination is directed at cultured intellectuals in this country I mean I wouldn't have a clue what you were talking about if you talk engines and tools yet I don't get a CHIP ON MY SHOULDER because of admitting I'm ignorant about cars!

So yes Thank God for the Multi-cultured seemingly less neanderthal Internationals :)

I reflected on the whole debacle of how I CLASH so much with the majority of native locals left in this country these last few years since 90% of my friends went overseas...the solution I found had a lot to do with teeing up with a really really old friend of mine who went to the same infants, primary, highschool AND uni I did...all in all we received a pretty high and advanced standard of education as can best be expected in Sydney....she too has found herself less than ecstatic with the Aussies and in love with the foreigners!! Like just about all my friends...

And I realised it goes like THIS....once you get out of fairly academic environments you get presented with the REAL state of Australia...and that is one where there is a very very low level of education among its residents....by this stage many of the highly educated typically go overseas since their qualifications give them access to more promising encouraging environments. I guess it's also cos our population is not that big either and not to mention higher education is a bit costly :P so relative we have quite a small population of very educated people, maybe throw in we are marooned on a desolate island far removed from the rest of the world...and it is so easy to shelter in a kangaroo microcosm where that much sun fries the brains and that much water clogs the ears that people aren't that broadly informed either...

And that is why as highly educated intelligent minority ethnicity FEMALES we are subjected to a huuuuge amount of disfavour and discrimination by the dominant majority in this country...I guess being a male minded non submissive slightly feminist INTJ doesn't help either ;) lol the more minority you are I think the more of a rude shock it is for the average person to encounter ...like something they have never encountered...and they don't quite know how to handle you but lament you are weird and abnormal because you are such a rare and special minority...hehe...if people thought I was weird here I wonder how HO gets away with it??LOL Simple. SHE is in America the Land of the Free! lol and anYthinG really does go there!!!

But seriously...in the last few years as the success of the asians particularly the Mainland Chinese has really made a huge presence known in this city I have really felt a level of racism and jealousy never experienced before growing up just because of what I look like on the outside! Which in turn has naturally made me start to feel resentment toward the other side...I know it happens all over the world but for the first 20 years or so of my life it was seriously a non issue, which is how I would have liked it to stay!

Wow code cracked, I'm glad...it's been such a mystery my inner psychologist has pondered so much about why I clashed so much with locals especially Aussie men of my vintage and younger my whole life...

It IS a cultural issue. Anyway once you work out what it is that is irking then you can just avoid it as much as possible...yay! ...Happy days! :)

Shining Light...

It's been really weird since I settled in my new town, which is quite bizarre how someone like me would end up in. Prior to gaining faith and the Holy Spirit I was completely insensitive to what spiritual darkness and oppression resides in this area in general, but like my eyes were opened, suddenly I am no longer blind. In fact the oppression of the people around me and all their issues was bad enough that I was unable to sleep!(Noise, Chain smoking fumes setting off my smoke alarm and sending my lymph nodes into swollen fits etc)

...So definitely a lot of people with problems...one day last week or the week before I finally hit the hissy fit internally and got the kick up the butt to action...no longer could I be the lazy, passive non confrontational uncaring random stranger bystander...these people's icky vibes were starting to get on my nerves!!! Sometimes people get into this stagnant state where they are so deep buried in their own sh*t in a pit so deep and wide that they are helpless to help themselves and can't see past the fuzz of all the muck until someone drags them kicking and screaming out!

So this morning I started spreading the *Light* in a more concrete way to "clean up" and "lift" the general "dirty" "heavy" feeling of the area. In stark contrast to my apathetic keep to myself nature I started doing mailbox drops, like an activist LOL!!! Pamphlets along the lines of THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE...JESUS IS YOUR ANSWER! lol

Non believers can scoff and snigger all they want, but when the sh*t hits the fan...where does everyone else go? What can everyone else do? NADA. There are so many problems in this world and people suffering afflictions that their greatest self sufficiency, ability or those of their loved ones, the greatest doctors, scientists, thinkers, philanthropists in the world have NO answer for! It is at that point when you have reached the end of the road that you can find the answer. So that's basically the message I wanted to share...that there is *Hope* and one who is greater than all and capable of all^^...God Bless :)

Erratic Busy

I think the Aussie Sun is making scrambled eggs out of my brain... yesterday I conked out on the beach and woke up all woozy and a bit disorientated...suddenly it hit me why the local people are the way they are a lot...too much sun can really fry your brain!! LOL But anyway it was nice to experience a bit of...culture...in a place where there is an emphasis on very high quality good food...nice to get some standards! ^^

Anyway last week was dead dull boring but was good cos I got a lot of (much needed) house cleaning done...this week I feel like I've packed so much in my seams and unexpected has cropped up that they feel fit to burst! I think I'm going to have to cop out of a few things...

So anyway feel a bit of that familiar too many balls in the air bustling stressy city anxiety...especially as I start to make tentative tracks to pick up where I left off...but it can't, won't be the SAME cos I've changed so much in that time...it really is an unknown...that is causing me some nervous tension if I think about it too much...blergh need to go qigong exercise or something after the sun goes down...

Classification: Boyly Girl...

A guy gave me this nickname some years ago...I realise he totally had it right...cos although I love to hang out with the boys I'm not the rude crude dirty mouthed dirty minded burpy beer guzzling stinky farters they are...I am however EXTREMELY BLUNT&HONEST. Which puts women on the off...and offends their sensitivities...

I think when I was younger and more brimming buzzing full of energy, perhaps I did roll more with the boys like a true tomboy might. But now I'm just a scaredy cat GIRL that just likes to tag along and OBSERVE all the scary, sometimes brave but often stupid things that men by virtue of their male ego and lack of forethought do...it's fun :)!

Not to mention I'd rather go to a soccer match above almost all girl-preferred things anyday!

However the key area where my unique boyly disposition truly seems to shine is that area of not just cross cultural inter-relations but rather cross-gender inter-relations...I find as somewhat of a "social bridge" between the genders I am most often called upon by the average person to "explain or intuit" the opposite sex! Typically...women ask me to decipher the internals of men's minds-age old question "does he like me does he like me or WHAT DOES THIS MEAN"...on the other hand I find I am the unconfident slightly socially inadequate man's best comfort to getting more adroit in being better able to deal with those women they have their eye on but have no idea how to pickup...I think rather charitable as being a kind of "mock training ground" for them to practice and rehearse and work on their moves and strategies, lol

In any case I don't mind it so much, as long as these people provide for interesting friends...It's quite satisfying to see little blooms I have tended grow and develop...lol and a much better way to use my "psychologist" hobby than on bonafide fruitcakes!

To round out this post I must say that I am really enjoying these little European fortune cookies that you get in BACI chocolates...I especially liked the first wrapper I pulled- very obviously by a German(Schopenhauer)...haha

Quien es amigo de todos no es amigo de nadie.

Qui est ami de tous ne l'est de personne.

A friend to all is a friend to none.

(And yes, I think that's what you find with most of the current generation and local culture these days...loyalty is a dying virtue in this fast paced shallow dog eat dog get ahead world...)

Out of the three languages which I know a bit...definitely I have to say I like the Spanish language best(verbal/text are both good)...French a close second(verbal good text more hassle), although I do like the relative brevity and succinctness of the English here....

anyway that is just my 2c on language, gender relations and loyalty today....ciao!

A Treasure Map!

Wow, even more bizarre adventures...featuring old men...lol!

So anyway an old guy randomly overheard that I was wanting mulberries(so very good for the eyes and blood you see...)

So I ended up with some obscure directions(later well documented in a hand drawn map) to a MULBERRY tree which is so prolific the owners are actually a bit stressed out unable to get rid of enough! So yeah...pretty interesting...I'm going to go to a random address, find this tree, tell the secret "codename" in case I get asked by locals how a random Japanese tourist managed to find this cornucopia...especially in the event that I need to bring out a big pair of loppers cos the random old guy assured me I would be free to take cuttings...let's hope he wasn't lying that his friend owns the tree...and hopefully I don't get resported by the old and curious locals as a curiously suspicious trespasser!

But yes...when one is lucky enough to be gifted a TREASURE MAP, one better at least try to go and claim their TREASURE! lol

Until the next bizarre adventure featuring old men, lol! Hope you have a good weekend :)

Choose Your Own Adventure...

This week has been a bit all over the shop for me...it's almost like being given a crystal ball to preview glimpses of your life having taken different paths...In any case nothing seems any clearer...I just feel a bit exhausted-drained...as if I've lived all those different paths within one week!!

Some much needed time out to myself and connecting with God I think...

A serious CONFESSION.

I'm actually starting to SERIOUSLY despise this country, or at least the majority population here just cos of what they're like...

Have a read of this thread...it's all true! Very disappointing. It's not like it was, typical Australian society has evolved into something really quite repulsive...

Congratulations to my multitudes of friends who have managed to mass exodus LEAVE over the past ten years and never come back!!!

In the meantime, I will endure, lol

Please please please let me meet some nice expats and foreigners here...somehow. Otherwise I'm going to turn into both a misanthropist and complete & utter racist...I have never met a bigger density of absolute D*CKHEADS than the twenties thirties generation in Sydney, Australia...which is also why my overseas friends who have visited once are unlikely to ever visit again...

It would be so refreshing to meet a sincere, honest person with depth and intellect of my vintage in this country...but that is seriously challenging the odds! I would know...it's been 30 years! lol, yes, which is why I identify as an optimist...if it's not IMPOSSIBLE there is still a possibility...

But to be honest, I really wish I was in Europe or North America amongst THEIR people right now...

Linear Time

So it finally struck me this obsession everyone seems to have with linear time... perhaps best reflected by that issue of AGE...cos I guess I've felt so old inside my whole life... that it's always been like a serious WAITING GAME for the rest of my peers to "catch up"! Suddenly though it dawned on me that perhaps I am starting to look a bit older on the outside and not only do I feel old and somewhat mature inside but even on the OUTSIDE! Oh and also that it is a gravity orientated and linear process...ie the only way is...forward and DOWN! Hello...wrinkles and white hair- arghhhh! (Okay not quite there yet but I can imagine...)

So I was just reflecting on how, now, with such a realisation I might adjust things in my life? Cos the other thing with linear human time is that there is a definite end point too!

Apart from that I'm really starting to enjoy the arranging fresh cut flowers in vases in my house thing...it's actually kind of disconcerting to realise (and admit) I am sooo turning into a...Girrrrl!!

Anyway my belly calls...need to go COOK! Eh the life of domesticated bliss...gotta love it! ;)

Spy Not Quite!

I've always had a thing for the whole 007 concept...I've always fancied myself a bit of one...lol! That is until I saw a more realistic portrayal of the world of international spydom...in MUNICH.

LOL somehow James Bond doesn't have recurring nightmares or trauma and isn't always watching his back...not nice!

Apart from that saw MONGOL about Genghis Khan which was also a very good film - yay :)

Apart from that WOW home maintenance is a huge task...spent the entire last two days just catching up to make house liveable- you go out three days straight and don't keep up with the housework and suddenly are presented with a mountain! Definitely need to not fall into that again!

The other cool "new" thing for me today is I have now started a trend of bourgeoisie bathroom lol...what else to do when you have fresh flowers coming out of your ears!!! Anyway I decided I quite like it....even if they are...PINK :p

Today I met a....CAVEMAN!

Lol, I'm serious :)

Very random. Very cool. Just kinda like how I like it. The weird part is I wasn't really anywhere all that interesting...usually all this cool sh*t only happens when I travel...not so close to home!!!

So yeah it was a very surreal today. Met my b'day twin, had lunch, then walking around waiting for a ferry...and we saw this open house inspection of a really cute little house- the agent was closing up but we liked it so much we convinced him to let us take a peek. Very cool, architect designed, cute and quaint. Right in nature. Where's the sugardaddy when you need one? LOL

So anyway we were walking away from this supercool house talking about it when some dude rolling a trolley with a big tall plant overhears us mistakenly and thinks we're talking about his big plant...so we're walking along this road and get into a friendly conversation...then after he said he likes all plants and I offered back yeah me too I'm a planthead!! He then issues us an invitation to come see his "garden" down the road...walking, walking...where IS this guy taking us? We see him stopped at the base of some rocks...lo and behold he lives in a CAVE! and strangely it was completely...civilised...and I actually envied him...ad contrary to what you would expect outside he just looked fairly normal, not unkempt and DEFINITELY did not smell like half the people reek in the city!! But to be fair he was still working on his new home...had only been there a couple weeks...how on earth had he known about such a cool spot? He came a lot when he was a kid...it was seriously the perfect little nook...very comfortable, completely free...absolutely spectacular, wow!

In any case with some degree of pride in his new digs I took his pics and agreed to send them to his family just to let them know he was safe...he had owned a house once before but had given it to his deceased brother's kids...and now was living this hermit natural life incognito...absolutely fascinating...I mean I've always had a track record of meeting cool interesting old men but CAVEMAN? wow, a very cool first! In any case so many interesting things happened today but that would have to be the highlight and I am too tired to elaborate further...

circa 1995-2000

I found a certain comfort coming full circle, a sense of being "home"...

snuggled into darkened cocoons with arty subtitled films, inspired by unknown sounds(in this case swedish jazz and jazz compositions made entirely of human voices)...

It's been a very, very long time since I've had the luxury to indulge this long lost me. It was good to come "home".

Que Sera, Sera....Escapism Love it! :D

Tomorrow will be back to another normal grind of a day, refreshed. Sometimes you just need a day off with no agenda...and entirely to yourself! Not to mention there are different SEASONS in life...a new revelation to me...is the one of stillness and silence where you conserve all your "essence" and concentrate all your energy and effort for yourself internally in prepation for external manifestation and frenzied paces at a later date??...so let's just say I'm the butterfly larvae in the cocoon growing nice and fat at the moment ;)

p.s I indulge words aka verbal diarrhoea too much hence gng to start engaging my right brain more with a picture each post(not necessarily related to the post, lol)...see how long I can last- before I get too lazy!!!

Fruits of the Spirit...A Meditation

love

joy

peace

patience

kindness

goodness

faithfulness

gentleness

self-control

May your life be filled with these :)

♥Zz

What is a Squeam?

Okay according to some dodgy online dictionary, a squeam is a "qualm".

But according to ME a squeam is my made up word and it is the X between a squeal and a scream!

So anyway I'm gonna come clean...with my manly ego... I had to shame myself in public, lol...

Today I SQUEAMED!...when I bumped into a spider's web above my head while gardening and the rather pretty spider with a round body was on my head and then went on my hand when I swiped it off...to God knows where...but I took off my jacket shook it around and hung it up just in case...

So yeah...Today I squeamed. And I did think a bit indignantly...blergh spiders- they're for MEN to deal with!! :P

*lol

Eating one's way through boredom...

LOL, seriously. Thank God finally a good burst of sun today to save my sanity...

So like the title says I've been doing a lot of that lately- well cos most of my waking hours revolves around food...procuring it, growing it or researching how to, harvesting it, preparing it, cooking it or cleaning up after it!

One night this week I DID NOT SLEEP THE ENTIRE NIGHT just cos I was so craving to try a swiss dessert called a beesting. I guess it was not a good idea to just before bed talk about all the different food excursions we needed to do for all the various things we wanted to eat with my birthday twin....the drool turned into ALL NIGHT obsessing- lol very easy for a scorpio gal that loves eating!

So anyway today was a weird dinner possibly reflective of the chaotic state of my restless itchy feet no travel blues mind...within the one meal I had a seemingly dissonant cacophany of ingredients: beetroot, parsnip, turmeric, rice dulse, fried egg, cayenne, salt, bak choy, lettuce, spring onion, garlic, spinach and flaxseed oil. Strangely, it tasted okay...don't even try and puzzle how I worked it all together! I think these days my meals are WEIRDNESS to say the least, okay maybe as I get older I get more eccentric, but apart from that there are several major factors a) organic food doesn't store so well so I need to use what is in the fridge b)I fresh harvest from my garden c) I want maximum supernutrition...so yeah end up with weird-ass meals!!! But somewhat smugly I NEVER get sick or want to throw food away from homecooked food whereas almost every single thing I eat outside makes me sick cos of all the additives, oil, salt and crap toxic ingredients they use and possibly a lack of freshness and hygiene. I met a batty old lady on the bus talking at the top of her lungs about how she ONLY eats organic as well ...lol I could forsee me in old age right there...it was a lil scary...lol

So the interesting thing which I checked up with my bday twin to see if we concur as usual (lol never get sick of this parallel experience feeling-it's too fun!) We both feel BOOOORED as and TIRED. Interestingly enough devoid of inspiration from daily life and the people around us devoid of culture etc grounded in THIS COUNTRY indefinitely...it was interesting that we reacted in the same way unbeknownst to the other...we turned to MUSIC! Specifically the need to create it! The last day or two I had been thinking I SERIOUSLY NEED a piano and to splurge on lessons...anyway she actually ended up buying a GUITAR today to cope with the boredom-had no forewarning it was pretty random!! LOL so interesting...music is obviously a huge muse for us....

Apart from that had soooo much flower proliferation in my garden I started cutting them and sticking them in containers around the house which is pretty weird and housewifely for me...also been watching lots of DVDs with an overrepresentation of foreign and German as per usual...

and indulging pretty expensive raw organic chocolate at $8/100g...yep that's how I deal with boredom and cooped up with rain! :P

Yup...

This would be me!

How could it not be when my friends are constantly jetsetting- last week lebanon this week hong kong. last week belgium, this week africa! arghhhhh I can't help it...i am SOooooo inSaneLY JEALOUS and craving my exotic foreigners...not to mention some...CULTURE....arghhhh.

Hope everyone else is enjoying their weekends...

Bug Off!

So anyway Spring has sprung down under (although incredibly temperamental) alternating between wintery chills and drenching showers and a rare treat today...balmy pleasant sun...My body is not appreciating it though, neither are my plants!! For one thing I'm starting to get rampant slug issues!! Possibly cos since my neighbour came back from holidays my resident kookaburra friends are getting too gourmet a meal next door with hand fed ground beef...to desire a palate of slugs! :P

So anyway my organic food production levels have been damaged and hurt significantly enough to warrant attempting to engage flower power warfare...going to try...Nasturtiums!! I'd been doing pretty well so far but I guess as Spring takes off and bugs proliferate (and try and get up my nose), and bite and itch I actually need to get more proactive (and less lazy) in plant management...if I hope to get fresh picked veggies to eat! So yep, some study & research to do...

Apart from that my house is looking like a bit of chaos creative...not cos I haven't been cleaning et cetera but rather a reflective manifestation of the consequences of having virtually nil short term memory and doing too many things simultaneously...half started projects all over the house- then I get distracted and start something else...so the look might be a pile of papers of bills and written but never sent correpondence, cords of electrical appliances trailing, a mop here a vacuum there, ingredients I've forgotten to put back in place after my many cooking sessions/day, not to mention gardening paraphenalia like gloves, masks and protective glasses and sun hat in different corners of the house and bags from different grocery trips half unpacked....enough to cause neat freaks a bit of a heart palpitation!...but ANYWAY hopefully it'll come good tomorrow-what else are weekends good for than to catch up with chores???!

....it's been a bit of a plastered week for me...my productivity levels are highly subject to the weather-when it's cold and rainy I am a cold blooded sloth/hibernating bear on the couch holed up with dvds trying to conserve energy...not to mention as a super introvert kind of a bit exhausted from excess social interaction this week...and finally, I'm still not tapped into the new daylight savings hours still- my sleep patterns are all over the place and I'm definitely 1-2hours behind still eating dinner around 9 or 10pm! What happened to the good old days when I remember there being 4 distinct seasons so my body didn't have to try and sync to four seasons in a day and a week...

At least besides nasturtiums I did manage to put in more radishes and bak choy at dusk relatively unscathed &comfortable for once thanks to my new best friend: natural insect repellant!!!

So this is my garden inventory currently: garlic, onion, spring onion, orange and purple carrot(still no success all twisty and forked!), silverbeet, kale(hopefully no longer slugged up once the nasturtiums flourish), red, green and rocket lettuce, bak choy, tatsoi, italian parsley, dill, strawberry, tomatoes, passionfruit, lemon tree, beetroot, lemongrass, leek, cucumber, zucchini, snow pea, lavender...phew! Also hopes to add celery, capsicum, dandelion, gotu kola, basil, coriander...I sure am a Greedy Gardener :D

Comfort Bears...

I'm kinda tired.

I kinda miss my old familiar peeps...

Too bad it's not like you can pull your favourite soft toy from 1983 out of a dusty old box...

People change...

But that doesn't mean you don't miss the memories...or the familiarity...

Children of God (o=

So JJ respects me mainly cos I have standards and that I don't compromise these despite what everyone else is doing or thinks.

But in any case just reflecting...definitely I've found that children of God with true faith have much higher standards especially in respect to human decency and conduct to others, and that it is not unreasonable to expect this :) So I am really grateful... It is nice that since we are accountable to a superhuman authority we aspire to higher standards and even if we may fail miserably-*cough* like being able to love our fellow human beings (lol), that AT LEAST it crosses our mind that we SHOULD be doing do...by virtue of the Spirit we have a conscience and a guilt if we don't which makes us at least want to try our very best to improve every subsequent time that same situation presents...

Anyway I take comfort in this that others with higher standards can be found still in modern day society...and that they do have some kind of marker on their head so I can at least seek them out when I feel like I need a team!

"But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love."

No Kidding!

No wonder I feel like I'm living in DUMB CENTRAL. And no wonder there is so much discrimination against people if they have brains...that they either leave or get tempted to...

Desert Drought

Oh boy was I feeling sorry for myself that I am stuck in a monoculture of boring predictable genericness that is dull, unrefreshing and uninspiring...at. best.!!!

But I got cheered a little that I have encountered a bit of a writer, in a style somewhat like my own: autobiographical honest and mildly eccentric- eg wordy but not TOO intellectual but interesting enough cos life is stranger than fiction...perhaps I will have to relift my game to quality writing and not just therapeutic rants, diligent recordings, trivial amusing anecdotal snippets...

Apart from the massive relief I felt when I returned back to the peaceful sanity of my sanctuary after a typical day of disgruntled chaos in the city, the only part that brought a bit of a smile was to meet a real live REAL non travelling European...wow it is so sad that they are so rare to encounter that I get this excited...in any case despite not exchanging so many words of any substance I don't know...even the presence was a comfort. Not sure what it is but me and Euros just...RESONATE :)

p.s I'm starting to re-think my anti-social status...I think perhaps I am NOT SO...just that apart from tiredness and introvert minimal energy capacity to take on other people, most people BORE me(like want to tear my hair out bore me)!!! I actually think given the RIGHT people who don't send me to sleep I can be VERY SOCIAL or at least a very good conversationalist...even charmingly so!!! WOW, who knew? LOL

Anyway I think my hair is a bit dry now...*yawn*! To bed To bed, Lay this BigHead!