Stop The Blog

Hmmm today I had some massive revelations and had the thought maybe I should stop scattering my energies so much especially in trivial pursuits such as blogging...surely I can find better "therapy" elsewhere? LOL or maybe as you get older the need for privacy increases?

Anyway it's pretty exciting and hectic busy for me right now...today has been an incredible day...I think being too busy and mentally preoccupied is probably my most healthy natural state!

I also think I'm moving from a state of idealism to one more of cynicism? Perhaps my inner child is coming more into resonance with the golden oldie here?

Anyway you can still keep in touch by email, chat and post!!! I'm not sure if I'm coming back here...we'll see! Or maybe if I keep a blog I will keep it a private access granted only one...it's been interesting to meet so many random strangers here but I think I'm just too tired to keep juggling so many random strangers anymore...Or maybe I am tired of investing in transient people...

May you have a nice blessed life! :)

"You don't belong here!"

It was the inevitable waiting to happen...Quite a JOKE really coming from a white INVADER of convict descent who has only populated this country for a mere blink of its history...

And treated its rightful owners with such contempt. If I were any closer I might have liked to add my own correction: "Well then, neither do you!"

In any case I didn't choose to be here: the choice was made for me. That got me thinking...just like people of mixed ethnicity who have a right to choose between each parents citizenships, people who had their nationality and citizenship decided for them as a child should have the right to decide which country they choose to belong to as an adult. Cos seriously after what I have experienced in my latter years here particularly recently I would seriously considering rescinding my citizenship...for one I am SO EMBARRASSED. In the past few months the few times I had non white looking people come to visit I'd say there was at least a 50% strike rate of a racial incident against them. It is embarrassing...as an idealist if I could rule the world I would make a global country purely with a population of educated and evolved minds. And like toyboy says the only way to end racism is probably to interbreed until everybody resembles a truly global ethnicity...

Maybe that is why I like NYC so much- it is like the global capital of the world...racism doesn't...CAN'T fly as much as it does here...I guess though that it is the effects of the Global Financial Crisis...the increasing resentment of the ethnicities that tend to be successful, rich and why? Because they work damn hard and have had their forefathers sacrifice a lot for them to receive a proper education and training so that they have a future their forefathers could only have dreamed of...

Okay before I get lured into being and staying completely racist myself I have to say that it IS a minority of imbeciles and I have great white aussie neighbours and people on the whole are pretty good compared to other countries...but that is also because apart from aesthetics there is nothing "obviously foreign" about me...

But yeah having lived the entire time here I can definitely say there is a revival of White Australia happening here big time! I just wish there were more aboriginals around to tell these bigoted invaders off LOL! For people who are not familiar with this country don't be surprised that you will be hard pressed to view ANY indigenous Australians(Aborigines) in daily life in the city...for that you need to go into the remote and desert regions...

Basically unless you are WHITE and MALE Australia is NOT paradise socially. It IS a beautiful country of space and nature and a great outdoors life though...

In other news I saw a very sad, shocked and traumatised looking Kookaburra sitting on my fence...then it occurred to me with all the slaughtering of the trees that went down today...my kookaburra friends are out of a home! Oh it's sad, Man and his unthoughtful destruction everywhere he goes...

A Point of Difference

(The only problem with living in gorgeous natural surrounds is that when it comes time for the trees to get a trim it is a VERY NOISY sleep defying procedure...between the horsepower revolutions of the electric chainsaw to the *whoosh!* as the thundering vibrations of large branches fall and hit the ground...)

I recently came across a character so refreshing I felt genuinely compelled and drawn for no other reason than uniqueness and a MUCH NEEDED 'breath of fresh air'...a point of difference amongst the stock standard majority culture of this isolated backwater.

Recently I felt so frustrated in this country with its trademark chauvinistic treatment of women to its low standards, anti intellectualism and bordering racist treatment of ethnic minorities...I remember learning about our country being a "melting pot" in primary school... rather than a melting pot it is increasingly pockets of different ethnicities all co-existing side by side and failing to have any flow of discourse between neighbours...breeding resentment especially if that culture wants to practise and preserve its indigenous traditions. I think the problem needs to be approached with a healthy balance...that all ethnic groups should have the freedom to practise their culture such as religious festivals and whatnot that doesn't violate the laws of that country however they should still care to make an effort with the mother tongue and integrate with the rest of the residents of their host country...

So as I've exited a globally flavoured educated intellectual context I have more than noticed the external population here have a really strong reaction to me- they either like or dislike me immensely...I have the ability to polarise populations! LOL Basically I think it stands as this...anybody who appreciates uniqueness and individualism will side with me but those who feel threatened by anything that is not status quo and need a generic robot standard will find me very challenging because I refuse to conform. Perhaps why I well deserve the "anti-conformist" and "rebel" label my folks pinned on me at a young age...

When I was younger perhaps it was more a case of "rebel without a cause" but as I grow older and feel incredibly oppressed by the dominant dissonant culture I feel a need to assert my right to be different and resentment towards people wanting to push me into boxes just so they feel more comfortable about themselves! And more than ever I feel a need to preserve my standards...and that the way forward is to push boundaries and always aim towards higher things. Not to stay complacent and degenerate...So there's definitely a clash of values happening here...

I guess when one's character defies all common and expected norms and sits at the far end of the bell curve and is not mute...yeah that invites a lot of arrows fired your way. I guess insecurity is a normal part of biological evolution...and a healthy characteristic of self preservation and survival instinct...so at the end of the day ALIENS, UNITE! lol well either that or leave like everybody I actually like seems to...

Dinner: One Cucumber :-o!

No I'm not depressed and lost my appetite. No I'm not so poor I can only afford one cucumber. No I'm not doing some heroic fast for some niche political cause. No I'm not depressed and have body image issues so I will only let myself eat one cucumber cos I'm on some silly diet...

But I DID just have ONE cucumber for dinner!! You see cos this was not any old cucumber! It was a *magic cucumber* I grew MYSELF! ^^ ^^ ^^

So it was a pretty special cucumber...and I found that out when I ate it...Wowee I was SOooo FULL! (I'm not kidding!!!)

I've actually had this conversation with one of my food grower buddies before...basically anything you grow yourself completely organically...it just is more filling! Why? Not quite sure but we theorized that it had something to do with all that TIME it takes to grow NATURALLY without the use of chemical fertilizers etc...well it has taken in all that sun and air energy from so many days!

But apart from that it also had a lot more flavour than that watered down commercial crap. Anyway now that I harvested my sole cucumber I'm going to have to wait quite a while for the next magic one...lol so lucky I have funds to buy sufficient ingredients for alternative dinners while I wait...That's the trouble with growing things in pots...you can't grow on mass...but eh who wants to eat 10 cucumbers every night anyway?

p.s My conclusions and observations of late...people my age and in my age and vicinity are 90% CRAZY, women ESPECIALLY are CRAZY!
p.p.s I REALLY hate this Tall Poppy Syndrome culture we have here...basically someone is always jealous of you of EVERYTHING and hates you for no better reason than for whatever lame reason they can come up with or wherever their insecurity lies...it's all this projection crap!
p.p.s my final rant is that non old and non young people are all so boring geez all they wanna talk about is relationships, people gossip etc...for an INTJ mentality boy this is tiresome! *yawn*
p.p.p.s I totally buy into that life works in terms of REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY...if you don't want something you get it in DROVES and if you do you DON'T! so yes for whatever you want I think you should probably construe it in your head as "I don't want this"...and voila...see I know ALLLLL the cool magic tricks, lol! Unfortunately however I have still not worked out how to make poorly made CDs know how to play music without skipping...grrrrr! I will hold out on CDs yet...Grandma is not quite ready to make the sacriligeous transition to digitized music :P

Progress...or lack thereof!

I visited my first alma mater tonight...it brought back a lot of memories and I was seriously impressed with how glam it has become...saw a fun film based on a comic about postgraduate life...Piled higher and deeper...it was nice to be in the midst of similarly intellectual people that could relate to the agony only those who have spent a third of their life in tertiary education facilities and the unique problems encountered by devoting so much of your youth to furthering your knowledge...

Meanwhile other people have had three kids ;) relocated to and travelled various continents several times already and even all the divorcees are getting REmarried lol! Shows how time flies...while you're busy with your head stuck in books...

Cannot compare though...furthering knowledge and saving the world as a direct offshoot of what you learn is quite a noble pursuit...haha. Just when people ask so...what's new? There isn't always a whole lot to say when these things can be the same old same old for years!

Or maybe I secretly can't get enough of the student life...in some respects student life is your heyday of fun times and sweet memories...but not so much as you get older and broker...and have student debts reaching for the sky... :P

But yeah for all the lack of visible progress I feel ALOT of things wriggling under the surface...it's even a bit exciting actually...